The Funny Guy who Shat his pants

Did you know that you can actually shit your pants without knowing it if you are drunk enough? A couple of months back, I was with a group of my buddies partying at a club called Dragonfly. It was a Friday night and the place was packed to the brim. Fortunately for us, the manager was a friend of mine and he got us a good table right in front of the live band.

DragonFly live band

We ordered drinks and within half an hour, we were having a great time partying with a group of hot girls who were sitting at the table beside us. It was at this time that I noticed that there was a weird looking guy sitting at the girl’s table. He was scrawny and looked dazed, not someone you would associate with a group of five hot girls.

I asked one of the girls if he was their friend. She replied that he was just a regular in the club and had asked to join their table for a while. I didn’t pay much attention to him until he started to stand up and dance in front of me. He was obviously pretty intoxicated and was dancing rather vigorously. He resembled a monkey high on  Valium.

I noticed that he was holding onto a glass of blackish, thick liquid which he sipped at regular intervals. Out of curiosity, I asked him what it was. He grinned like a Cheshire cat and said,”A mix of everything.”

He then offered me a sip of his drink. I took a whiff of it and almost puked. It smelt like Chinese herbal medicine mixed with rotten eggs and stale fish. I declined politely. He guffawed loudly and turned his attention to the hot girl standing beside me. As he tried to sexy dance with her, I noticed an expression of disgust and horror on her face.

About ten minutes later, he finally got tired and sat down on a chair beside me. He continued to consume his concoction at a rapid speed. All of a sudden, an unbearable murky odor greeted our noses. Within seconds, everybody moved away from the table except for Mr Strange. He didn’t seem to notice anything and continued to bob his head up and down to the beat of the house music.

I suspected that he may have puked on the floor but I did a quick scan of the area and found that there was no puke. What on earth was the smell? It got increasingly unbearable by the minute.

Finally, the mystery was solved when our dear friend stood up from his seat to dance. All of us let out a collective gasp when we saw the huge patch of brown stain on his blue Jeans near his ass. He had shit in his pants without even noticing! And we can actually see the stain through the blue jeans! It must be a hell lot of shit!

The Funny Shit Incident
This is probably what it looks like inside his jeans

I quickly commanded the waiter to escort him out of the club. Guess what he told me as he was being led away? He shouted at the top of his lungs,”Don’t let anyone take my drink! I will be back soon!”